Things I'll never say
by Otaku-for-life
Summary: It is Nowaki's and Hiroki's tenth anniversary, since they first started going out. Nowaki has a big date planned, and Hiroki is wondering what's going to happen? HirokixNowaki, songfic


**Au-chan: I don't own Junjou Romantica, or the song 'Things I'll never say' by Avril Lavigne. (forgot to add this) Enjoy! **

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_I'm tuggin' at my hair  
I'm pullin' at my clothes  
I'm tryin' to keep my cool  
I know it shows_

I fixed my hair, and tucked in my shirt. I shook my head, and quickly un-tucked it. Ugh, he is so going to notice how nervous I am. Today was 10 years that Nowaki and I had been together, and he decided that we should have a big date. He was just arriving home now, after 26 hours at work. He had worked all yesterday, just so he could be with me today. It was 11:00 A.M, and luckily, I had no work today. I walked to the door, and looked at myself in a mirror. My hair was way too nice looking. 'Just look casual Hiroki! It's just your boyfriend for ten years now…' I ruffled my hair a little, then opened the door.

"Hiro-san!" Nowaki hugged me, and squeezed me close. When he let go, he kissed me on the lips, and went to change. I looked at my feet, and blushed. Uh, what to say… What to say?

_I'm staring at my feet  
My cheeks are turning red  
And I'm searching for the words inside my head_

"Are you going to hurry up?" I called, the wrong words coming out. I was way too nervous for this date. Nowaki hadn't told me anything about his plans, and I was worried from head to toe._  
_

_'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah..._

"We can go now. Sorry to keep you waiting." Nowaki came out in some jeans, and a dark blue T-shirt. He was grinning like an idiot, and grabbed my hand. I blushed again. We walked out of our apartment, and walked to the train station.

'I hope I can make him as happy as he'll probably make me today…' I thought, looking up at my tall lover.

_If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I want to blow you-away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could see what I want to see  
I want to see you go down-on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say_

"What exactly do you have planned today? For us to go out this early, it's kind of odd…" I said.

"You'll see. I'm hoping you'll have tons of fun." Nowaki smiled, and I looked away from him.

"Idiot…" I mumbled. I continued to think of what we were doing today. 'Aquarium? Amusement park? Library?' I shook my head. 'Where the hell is he taking me?' I mentally yelled at myself. Before I knew it, we were on the train. I must have been so lost in my thoughts. We sat down, and Nowaki looked at me.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked.

"Oh, nothing." I couldn't let him know I was thinking about him.

_It don't do me any good it's just a waste of time  
What use is it to you what's on my mind?  
If it ain't comin' out, we're not going anywhere  
So why can't I just tell you that I care?_

"I can let you in on a secret." He said, smiling. I nodded. My curiosity was killing me.

"We're not going to be in Tokyo, until tomorrow." My jaw dropped. He was taking me somewhere big. Ugh, this brat was going to murder me today. We're probably going to Hokkaido, or Osaka or something else! My face flushed with more curiosity. That little secret didn't help in the least bit…

_'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah..._

In two hours, we arrived at Osaka, for some odd reason that Nowaki wouldn't tell me about! Damn him, and his secretive self.

"Follow me Hiro-san." He smiled, and led me off the train and out of the train station. This guy… He was all about the perfect date, wasn't he? He led me to a huge building, and I stared at it.

"What are we going to be doing here?" I asked. He smiled, and led me into it. He told me to close my eyes, and I did, just so he wouldn't whine to me in public. We walked for a couple minutes, before he sat me down and told me to look up. I did, and I realized where we were. A planetarium. I smiled at him, then looked back up.

"There's a planetarium in Tokyo, you know…"

"I know. But this one was better. And besides, no one came today." I looked at him. He was smiling a little less, but still with the same feeling of love. Oh, how I wanted to kiss him right there! But I didn't have to. He did it for me. And we kissed, not looking at the stars, and we held hands in the dark, and kissed for a while.

_If I could say what I wanna say  
I'd say I want to blow you-away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could see what I wanna see  
I want to see you go down-on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say_

After the planetarium, we went to lunch, having some Osaka food, that wasn't better then Nowaki's cooking, but it was decent. After that, we did go to a amusement park, and then an aquarium. Man, what a horribly romantic person Nowaki was. By the time we were done looking at fish, we went to dinner. It was 5:00 when we went in some family diner. We ordered the same thing, and ate talking small talk about our jobs and what not. It was 7:00 when we finished eating dinner and a dessert.

"One more thing, before we go to the hotel we'll be staying at." Nowaki said. We took the bus and went to a beach. There was barely anyone there. We walked down to it, and sat under a tree.

"This is nice." I said, smiling at the ocean, and the setting sun.

"Glad you think so." We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. What could we talk about, that we didn't already talk about at dinner? I racked my head for thoughts, and couldn't think of a good conversation. My curiosity booted in again.

"W-what are we going to do when we get to the hotel?" I asked, stuttering. Oh yeah, great question curiosity. _  
_

_What's wrong with my tongue?  
These words keep slipping away  
I stutter, I stumble like I've got nothing to say  
'Cause I'm feeling nervous  
Trying to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it, you're worth it  
Yeah... _

I felt his smile. I felt his blue eyes looking at me, like he would never look at anyone else.

"Whatever you want to do Hiro-san. I'm all yours." I blushed.

_I guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say_

We sat under the tree, just watching the sunset go down, and we waited for the stars to come out. It was surprising how we could sit there for a couple hours, not saying anything, just waiting for time to pass. When the stars did start coming out, there was actually a shooting star shower today. Man, I loved this guy.

"Make a wish Hiro-san." Nowaki and I closed our eyes, and made a wish. I was betting his wish was something like, "I wish to always be with Hiro-san."

'_I wish… I wish Nowaki and me will always love each other, and hope we will be together for more than this…_' I looked up at Nowaki, and he looked at me.

_If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I want to blow you-away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?  
If I could see what I want to see  
I want to see you go down-on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say  
_

"Want to head to the hotel?" Nowaki asked, squeezing my hand. I nodded. We walked across the beach, holding hands, kissing once in a while, until we made it to the bus stop. We waited for our bus, then went to the hotel Nowaki reserved.

_**11:30 P.M, hotel room. **_

"Hiro-san… I love you. Happy ten year anniversary…" Nowaki whispered, before I fell into sleep, thinking of how I wanted him to be with me forever.

_These things I'll never Say..._

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**Au-chan: :D Got this insirpation just by listening to this song, and was like, "Hell yes! Hiroki would never freaking say this!" And that's how this came to be. I think I could've done a little better with this, but I still like. Anyways. Now, it's time to go update "It all started with a party." Damn...**

**Anyways! Hope you liked it, review if you liked it, tell your friends if they like Junjou Romantica or the Egoist couple. And uh... Oh, criticism is welcome. :D **


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